Just a word of caution.
When we moved my now one-hundred-one year old mother-in-law into the Assisted Living Home, we provided them with a Power of Attorney for Health Care, as well as a Directive to Physicians, and the Do Not Resuscitate Order. Recently, we learned that they had forgotten to look in the med book when sending her to the ER with dangerously high blood pressure. and they would have done the entire resuscitation procedure (against her wishes) if it became necessary, and no one seemed to remember she was a Do Not Resuscitate! We HAD given the Power of Attorney for Health Care, Directive to Physician AND the Do Not Resuscitate to Home Health, the Home, her doctor and the hospital, and at the time, they all assured me they would be filed or scanned into the system. But THEY ALL FORGOT.
If you have elderly parents, with a Do Not Resuscitate Order, be sure to remind all parties regularly. If you don't have the aforementioned paperwork, talk to your lawyer and your family. My husband and I have the Power of Attorney for Health Care as well as the Directive to Physicians. A copy stays in our carry on luggage.
The Power of Attorney for Health Care is critical. Without it, the doctors will not inform family members of their loved ones condition. In February, we got a call about our parent being sent to the hospital when we were 125 miles away. In spite of the fact, I'd given them the paperwork the August the year before, they wouldn't tell us anything, and we had to drive back. Now, we also have a copy of my mother-in-law's paperwork in our carry-ons, so we can fax it to them if needed.
We picked up our first Do Not Resuscitate order at our local Hospice office.
Attitude In the Workforce
13 years ago
Hi Martha,
ReplyDeleteThank you for these GREAT words of advice. I'm currently with my 92-year-old Mother, who is as stubborn as they come! She refuses to move in with any of her kids, lives alone in a 4-bedroom home, and is 250 miles away from my closest sibling, nearly 2000 miles from my husband & I. I'll be flying home Sunday after 11 days.
I am sole P.O.A., sole Health Care Proxy, and sole Executrix of her estate. She is also a DNR.
I too keep copies of all legal documents with me at all times. So I understand all you said and also urge all others to do the same.
andrea/BGPM
My parents were 350 miles away and sis was 1500 miles away. Doesn't make it easy. We're so glad the mother-in-law worked with us with all the legal documents. My parents didn't, and we had to go to court when things got bad.
DeleteWe ended up moving the mother-in-law into Assisted Living while she was in rehab.
Thanks a lot for posting such an informative blog. it will be surely helpful to a lot who struggles to take care of elder persons. Yet there are a lot of senior assisted living homes available, it will be special to do it by own.
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